By Sechavar

 

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Brittney showed me this, so I’m sharing it with whoever else reads this.

Black people have two voices, sometimes three. I’m half Black and half Mexican, so I have like, 3 or 4 voices.
White people have one voice, and then maybe a variation when they are intoxicated.

Dear White People,

We have several voices because if we interview for a job or answer the phone at work the same way we talk to our Moms, we would not get hired, and would def get fired. I’m not upset if you remark on this fact.
Case in point: I answered my mother’s call in front of some white friends (I’m in Grad school, so lots of new white friends). I spoke first to my moms, then to my Grammy (this is the black side of the family). After I hung up, my white friend to my right commented “You got so black right there.” And I was actually kind of proud of myself because being a creative writing student/living in SoCal hasn’t exposed me to many other black people so it’s nice to know I still go it. I explained that my Grammy doesn’t even understand me if I don’t talk like that. Seriously. She will make me repeat everything if I speak slowly and without rhythm.
My moms is a little different, she has different voices too since she’s a cashier at a suburban grocery store.

I also have a kind of Mexicana voice, and then I have classroom participation voice, and TA in the classroom voice, and job interview/telephone voice.

So, yeah. Black people are socially multilingual. It’s okay white people, if you listen hard enough, you’ll realize it’s English. Except when I’m speaking Spanish. You’ll just have to put up with that. But if it’s any consolation, I’m no where near fluent, I just sound like I am.

Sincerely,
Sechavar

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